Friday, January 9, 2009

Word of the day......

With my luck the word of the day is probably a swear word....I just don't know it
cause it is in Spanish.. that is just my luck.... With just a little good luck..I might
learn something!

I have to admit....I have wonderful friends.....James offered to pay for an extra
cub scout shirt. As it turned out the child in need left cub scouts. I think
he may have left because St. Maries is a depressed area. Few people have
jobs. Those who do have them are trying to help their friends who don't.
That is the type of town it is! They don't sit back and wish they could
help. They stand up and do something! He did not quit scouting because
he didn't have enough parental care.....

James and I cared. Computers are wonderful. I've never seen or met
James. I know he is a good man. I know he is a caring man and I think
of him with pride, that he is my friend!

I still have no idea who the child was. I know he was seven. I know he and my golden
Stephen did not have the uniform to be cub scouts. I doubt his parents
had any more money than my Daughter. I think there should be
more like James. People who don't care who the child is. People who
only care that he would be the ONLY seven year old in St. Maries
Cub Scouts Without a uniform... The only kid who didn't look like
the rest of the kids in their proud uniforms. The only kid who didn't have one!

St. Maries taught me many things... is a "different" town. Idaho is a
different place..We love our children.We want them to be children as long
as we can keep them that way. We want them to have wonderful child hoods!
Someday when they are grown, we want them to go off on their own
and be independent. They better do what we want them to do while they are
being independent.

Shut your mouth and EAT!

Then there was Shirl One Sister of my heart!
Shirl who has been through so much in the last few years. She hurts
so badly because of her generous heart! A heart so big, that when it
was broken she was stricken! She became ill, but her heart was
still Strong. Her spirit is weakened, but no one could make
her soul small. No one could steal her pride!

Mikie,who are like my sisters I have never seen in person, Sisters
I may never meet. In other lives, perhaps in other worlds we
grow in the same house. We are all women of strong conviction who
would fight for what we believe in! Women who would fight
for each other.Women who have fought WITH each other to
save the life of who ever was in trouble. These are bonds stronger
than those forged in the same house, the same town . These
are Heart sisters! All...

I never thought to have friends with bonds so strong I could feel
their pain in my own limbs. I could see their homes in my mind.
I could Nearly TOUCH them in my dream state. Friends like
Debra whom I met so many years ago. We have been through
so many trials. She has had surgery on her knees. She worked
so hard in her life fighting to make a living in a man's world at
a job held by only MEN in times gone by.

There is Joyce, And Kert, and Jon! Sometimes when I see
her words on screen I can feel the hurt in her heart. At
Other times I can feel the laughter. Who'd of thunk that
a fat lady from Idaho could be so blessed. That I could
have so much in my life. So many wonderful adventurous
and brave people. These are folks who have driven across
this continent from West to East just to get to know us!
They have done this TWICE....

Then I think of people I have met... friends in Idaho, I'm reminded of Linda.
Linda is a beautiful woman from the East. She strives to have a comfortable
way of life. Here in the WEST.I must admit she does it so very well.
I know it is not effortless.It is hard work having a charming home and keeping up with a husband.That is multi- tasking! She is good at it!

If you are reading this Linda...
I loved the fudge. I'm glad it is eaten. It won't be there calling me in the
middle of the night...."Laurel, Oh Laurel! Come out here! Things eaten
in the light of the fridge have no carbs! There are no sugars in things eaten
in the dark! Hay! Diabetic woman! IT is time to come get your sugar fix!"

OH! I shall MISS That fudge! Like lovers, We had such Homey conversations in the dark.
It would whisper to me. I would caress it! I would savor it. I'd let the
smooth chocolate silken Dark and tastey, melt in my mouth and trickle slowly down
my throat in an orgy of tastes and sensations Ever so slowly, I would masticate.
I'd move my tongue through that soft thick chocolate.
Slowly I would chew on the nuts! Till I was surfeit with the hard chewy geatness of
them. In a nearly orgasmic moment The flavor would SpURT forth! I would swallow!
When it was overI was compelled to lick my chocolate covered
fingers till the last vestige was gone, past my lips, every taste bud was
excited alive with pleasure and wanting more more more. Awwwwww!
Give me a SMOKE!

Then there is Sherri, a woman who's generosity is unforgetable.
This lady sent me bottles and bottles of cinnamon. To make sure
I didn't poison my diabetic self with the smooth delicious unforgettable
Fudge! Sherri who is another generous heart. Her life is not
easy. Always I feel her love of life in her words. When she describes
her children I can't hide my smile. All the love probably raises
my blood sugar by at least a hundred points....Yes! I am a blessed
person!

Maddie, Ahh Maddie, A woman who says what she believes in!
A woman of laughter and light! She is a woman of talent...how do you
know you are blessed. You are blessed when you get to know someone
so well, A woman you have never met, but a friend still! A joy!

I hardly knew where to begin. I hope it never ends........





Friday, January 2, 2009

They grew up without my permission.....


It seems strange to sit in a living room, in bright light beside the TV. My fella sits beside me holding the dog who owns him. Somehow we are closer here than I am in an open doorway a few feet away. I am more a part of his life sitting here on a slow computer he paid ten bucks for at a yard sale. More and more as I listen to him fight for air when he has a bad day, I need to be a part of their lives . Here I set on my prehistoric Compaq, waiting for it to load, when I could be a few feet away on my lovely Dell computer. I could be just a few steps away. Perhaps a lifetime away....My son bought the Dell for several hundred dollars a few years ago at Christmas!I have Great kids, even though they tricked me by growing UP while I was not looking.

Just when was it they became adults? Was it 15 ? I know that was when they were sure they were smarter than either of us? Was it at 18 when the law said they could go where they wanted and do as they please?

I'm not really sure WHEN they grew up? One day I opened my eyes! I saw them packing out all the things we'd bought them and they had treasured over the years. They were on their way to live "on their own!"...
They took all their favorite things. They packed them into cars and into homes. They each left a box. I don't know what is in those boxes? I think it is just something" for seed." They left just enough of themselves behind so they could always call this home. They KNEW it was home cause they had a box of things there waiting for THEM. A box of "Stuff" they knew I could never bare to throw out;because it was a part of them and a part of our lives, before they grew up and away from our home....

Now my eldest is nearly in her forties. She is well on her way. I find bits and pieces of her things occasionally, a picture of her teen aged years and her friends. Something to make me think of her as a little girl! Something to remind me of her childhood. Now she has Children of her own. I find things that belong to them, to remind me they too lived in my home. They too were children here, a part of our lives, growing more important in our hearts. One will soon be a teen, where did his child hood go? Where is that little boy who played havoc with our heart strings, brought dust and dandelions to his grandmother on a long ago spring day in Idaho??? Back to where we started, when is it they GROW UP????

I enjoy them NOW, probably, not as much as I enjoyed them as children, I knew at the time I was raising strong, hard working adults. I knew I was not raising children!....Perhaps they were mostly adults at the time. They were growing into what I wanted them to be all along...








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Happy New Year from Frozen Idaho!


There is something quite warming about sitting on a cold night reading Robert Service
poetry.Specially when you have friends and a few beloved roots in Alaska...Suffice to say it is warmer in Idaho tonight than in Fairbanks last week....was -10 here and -30 there.

In Fairbanks they planned better for the snow time than they did in Idaho. In Fairbanks you can go from one business to the one on the back block through adjoining doors! You could leave the old drugstore and go into another building simply by walking out a back door...It was the easiest way to get to my Aunt's beauty school...That wasn't the better part of town. Fact is, it was kind of a seedy district. It was HER town. From the end of the war till she passed in the fifties she loved Alaska..I loved it when she introduced me to it and the many characters she knew there...

I remember standing in a crowd of people in a bar where a woman played "Honky Tonk" piano. I was in love. I think I was also 14 and it was a big bar in a very small town. I'm not sure any more. I think it was Chicken Alaska. At midnight a man sat on the back of the tall piano and recited" The Ballad of Dan McGee" I knew the poem well. I'd always loved his poetry because he had a sense of humor that actually had rhyme and Meter!

How cool was THAT! It was as if I had never heard or read the poem before. The hair on my arms stood on end. I could actually feel the bone chilling cold, and the heat of the fires as he stood in the door way to hell, and watched Dan and listen to him tell his friend it was the first time he had been warm since he got to Alaska!

The cold of Alaska never bothered me a whole lot. I couldn't stand the darkness. I knew that with out even trying. I adored the idea that it was Daylight at midnight. cause I am a night person by nature. I watched on the twenty first of June the Midnight son, go down, and come up again. It happened in a matter of minutes that made it seem as though one was looking at two suns at the same moment!

I can't tell you the beauty of Alaska, I haven't got the words. I can tell you of the mosquito! They are the State bird! There was a story went around a mosquito landed at Edwards air force base,and they dumped in 200 gallon of jet fuel before they noticed it was not an airplane.....In order to take a good picture you had to stand in front of your subject for a while and wave a towel. That kept the mosquitoes from spoiling the picture!

I remember talking with a Native in the Yukon. He paid no mind to the mosquito except to put his hand on his forehead occasionally and dragging it down, then shaking the little beggars off his hand as though his hand was full of some smelly ointment, or cow manure. This is no joke. You would be driving down the AL-CAN "highway"....NOW it is paved...when I went up in the sixties...it was dirt all the way! you could drive for miles and miles, all you would see was a moose on occasion, and more miles and miles of trees and mountains. One would think there was no one for WELL....Miles and Miles! You had no idea where in the world he was coming from, or where he was going.

This was the sixties when a good pair of my favorite white tennis shoes were less than five bucks in the "lower 48" I've always had a frugal soul. You can imagine my distress when I found a pair in Alaska was a resounding 8 bucks! Then I went walking in the tundra. I walked off the road and into the bush only to sink waaay deep till I got through the mud and reached the permafrost down below. The Tennis Shoes were brand new. They were White as a sheet, till I took the walk!

In order for this to be any fun for you. you have to realize I was fanatic about my WHITE tennis shoes being BRIGHT white. I liked to spray them with spray starch, and then put on white liquid polish!They left Alaska a color that can best described with the afore mentioned manure!

The seasoned sled dogs of Alaska were both a mystifying and startling to me. They were beautiful animals. The Working dogs walked like a "muscle man!" You could watch every muscle in their bodies ripple as they walked across the road at leisure. It was no surprise to any when you realized that they thought they owned the world! Probably from where they stood, they DID!

I can NOT imagine a poodle sled dog! BUT, A poodle will pull till he literally bursts his heart. I don't mean the itty- bitty kind that people think are so cute. Mine is a snarling little gray mutt who knows who he owns. I mean the big aggressive kind of Poodle who will take on a bear. Poodles know no fear, a bitty little guy like Mine of twenty pounds..fat old man that he is would fight a wolverine if he thought his human was in trouble. They do not allow poodles in dog races. No it is not cause they look stupid in harness...people actually give them that stupid hair cut! It is because when they lay down on the frozen tundra their curling hair freezes to the ground!

So much for dog lore.....Have a wonderful New Year,








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Saturday, December 13, 2008

Winter is HERE...

Four inches of snow on my car last night....all night long I listened to it falling off the trees and out buildings..I dreamed of monsters marching through my living room..knocking things down with their tails as they went along......boom boom, rumble, roar.....Winter is Here...all we need do is open the door....It's supposed to be below zero here in a few days...I mean way below...as much as 15 below.

As children we used to walk to the school buss on the sparkling cold crust of the winters snow. If you were small enough....Light enough...you could travel a long way like that before falling through and barking your shins. The shins weren't the worst of that problem..The very worst was the boot top was below the level of the layer of new snow. The boot filled with snow. All the way to school one had to sit in ice cube cold boots! When we got to school we had to change our shoes, we carried clean Socks in our coat pockets...boy that was a smelly coat room!!! It was best to save an old lunch bag to put them in. Unless you wanted your pocket to smell like your wet feet when you took the early morning pair home! Mom's usually had small minds about such goings on. School Janitors didn't help either. Every Friday they threw out everything on the floor of the cloak room. Every Friday.....You best take care your extra pairs of socks!








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Monday, November 10, 2008

A Day with Baby Bear....


His Daddy was called Bear, for the special way he walked....He kind of rolled along like a Baby bear. He never stopped long, and little things like falls or doors didn't seem to stop him. He was built like a line blocker. He was broad shouldered and narrow at the hip.....Till he went to work at the age of sixteen he was BEAR. Even in School to his classmates he was Baby bear......Now to my Joy I have a Baby Bear.....

Baby Bear has the same shaped big Dark eyes. We can't quite decide which color DARK eyes. They are surrounded by long black eye lashes.

He has his Mama's beautiful Italian, Polish coloring mixed with my Native American high cheek bones and facial shape. He is a beautiful little boy! He is full of fuss and bother!

Today he discovered the joys of a balloon.......He found it in the bathroom..Just what you want your baby buddy to be playing with.......A balloon found on the bathroom floor!

We played our own brand of "balloon foot ball" with it for quite a while..Till he decided he HAD to see what it tastes like..He now has five teeth and has to try them OUT....He did his best to throw it at me..Each time he got it behind his head to get a good toss, he dropped it and he had to chase it in another direction.It was better than one year old roller skating to watch that little guy try to get his balloon trained to hit his Grandma, each toss it was somewhere behind him..He chased and chased....we laughed and laughed till that old devil...Nap...took over his world...Maybe some day he will have some stories about the hills and dale of Idaho for you to hear....

I'm sure he will make a lot of memories....








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Tuesday, September 2, 2008

looking back at winter in Idaho

As a child in Idaho I can remember back forty years to the cold winters with snow butt deep to a tall Indian.....We were not Native Americans,yet! We did have some Tall Indians!
Mother grew up on the prairies far below where we lived. She swears they could sled off the fence rows ;but she only grew up to be five foot tall.What does she know!
I remember Ice cycles hanging from the eaves of our log house that were taller than me.was always broken hearted when my brothers knocked them down so they didn't fall on me......we woke every morning to bedroom windows frosted on the inside...Jack Frost broke in while we were asleep and painted forest and fairy dell on our windows from his winter white pallet.

We were the proud owners of an army surplus 4x4 to drive through our hills in the winter. We had horses to pull it out when it got stuck! I remember Dad burning off a set of snow tires in two weeks trying to get home in the deep snow.It was a dirt road and he was to lazy to walk. Walking was reserved for children. It must have been to deep to plow! Though, that new car he bought like clock work every two years; plowed a lot of snow by the time he was done with one.
I remember walking on the hard crusty snow to the bus stop, about half a mile down the road. Half a mile down and four miles up! That was fun till you hit a soft spot in the snow and filled your winter boots with the white ice crystals. we caught the bus at the community mail boxes. Our little community was comprised of our family and was a private community with no school bus nor snow plows above the bus stop.That was where we met several families who lived below our property who weren't related......I think! Though in the area we lived in and with our big family relationships seemed to change and flux with the changing of the moon....or at the whim of the moon shiner!

Grandpa dragged a plow behind his work horses for many years, before Dad discovered one of he drivers had a weakness for "shine!" He'd take that snow plow driver out a hot thermos of coffee about half filled with "Shine". From there on he didn't plow to straight, he did plow deep! He also plowed all the way to the top of our mountain. At the peril of his job being taken away from him for using the county plow ant fuel to plow an extra five miles!

It wasn't a good idea to follow his job to closely while leaving the hill. There were some interesting "drop off" on one side of the road.You could roll a car quite a ways down if you got over to far. At times he got pretty close...That must have been some pretty strong coffee, the old man brewed!
The walk on the crust of the snow wasn't all that bad..we had several stops to make to get us warm. We needed to carry in wood for our Grandmother and feed the horses,and the pigs who's sty was near our uncles house.If the wind was right and he was on the correct shift he would give us a ride to the bus.Mostly we walked snow, sleet, or wind storm.On really cold cold days we could hear the trees pop like rifle fire. They would freeze and explode! I was always afraid I would be standing near one when it went OFF!
One of the kids decided he COULD put his tongue against one of the mail boxes in below zero weather...Of course his wet tongue against the extremely cold metal stuck like glue.
"HEWP! HEWP!" He bellered as soon as he heard the old school bus growl it's way up the mountain road. "Do't eve m hwere." He tried to yell without moving frozen lips of tongue stuck firmly to the metal....The boys were getting desperate....zippers were ready to come down, I don't know for certain what they had in mind cause they made me turn my back and hold my mittens over my eyes...

They waited as long as they could. One remarked in Soto voice "You can't do that Joe;the bus is full of GIRLS." I never did ask just what it was they could not do!!!

The bus driver stopped the smoking growling old bus....the door came open..Stone faced he climbed from the bus..He ordered us onto the cold bus. Our feet Never thawed out the whole ride.....Never EVER! The seats crackled under us as we plopped down on them they were so cold....We sat very still with our hands clenched together as though in prayer..WE knew he was gonna' tell our Dad we somehow caused this travesty and Everything would "Hit the Fan!"

For a moment he stood like a statue, He tooo looked like he was frozen in place....The child screamed just once as he snatched that kid off the frozen mail box; leaving hair hide and all, the remnants of a child's frozen tongue firmly attached to the old mail box. I swear he talked like he was frozen solid to that chunk of metal for the rest of the school year. We all had a good laugh when we saw him with a make shift bandage on his tongue......An old wash cloth was tied to his tongue...and knotted right at the top!










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Saturday, July 12, 2008

July In Idaho

I don't ever remember another July in Idaho when the honeysuckle has bloomed in my back yard. They are usually in bloom in early June....

I have a four foot tall tomato with at least twenty buds on it.....but it has yet to set on ONE tomato......I've had salad from my yard...lettuce, dandelion, and other wild things.

Gary's corn is about six inches tall.. To say the least it is not doing well. Strange year in Idaho. I haven't been swimming yet.

I like the lakes when they are cold. Soon they will be to warm to cool me while I swim. I have broke out the old Exercycle bike. I have my cardio glyde. I've been working at them . Getting old is not for the faint heart. Being so fat is probably why I have not been in the lake....Even at sixty I'm vain..."Vanity thy name is OLD woman." I don't REALLY think that is the way that quote went. It is close enough!....

Jacob,paid us a visit with his second Daddy, last night. He tells me ."he is lucky cause he has two daddies. Most little boys only get ONE."

The child put five miles on the exercise bike. Dug a bike that belongs to Stephen or Axston. It was deep inside the shed.he really and to work for it. He rode it all over the place as fast as it's little tires would carry him.....

He also went to the park where He hung from the bars and ran over under around and through the play ground equipment while we watched it became at once, Tom Sawyers island...Treasure islands walkway...and a ship to ply the deep waters of Northi Idaho!!! He did calesthenics, he climbed the "childs mountain1"He hung from rungs and fell on his head!. He tires me out just watching him. He rode my cardioglyde machine too....He pulls the handle all the way down so it touches his forehead! In that position the back of the machine goes way up.....It's like a "do it yourself"teeter totter!......He is quite a guy, our Jacob.

I am told the elder children are going to camp this week. This means I had to go get Stephen a pair of shoes to wear to camp. He had nothing but flip flops. You know the kind we used to call thongs. His mother was going on about his shoes being left at camp on a recent camping trip with the family. I was amazed she let him go. Ace was "to grounded" to go. cause he got bad grades in school.....expletive deleted....
Camping with Grandpa and his Uncles was pretty important..I think there was much more to this than we will ever know...

At any rate his shoes, she was so upset over were found. They had holes in the soles...poor kid. I guess if you have nothing a bit of something is better than none at all. I don't understand her thoughts....but TJ was going to buy him a new pair..I bought him a couple pairs to wear now and will get him a nice pair for his birthday....in case he leaves them at church camp....Which is all together likely with this little guy. He is a normal six year old..Shoes are not a priority.

He sure liked catching crawdads with Uncle....The first thing Jacob did was pick one up wrong and it grabbed him! He was not as thrilled with Crawdad fishing as Stephen! Auntie took them rock climbing....wading and picking wild berries...they roasted wieners and marshmallows...they sang camp fire songs. There was no stress and loads of laughter....

As an aside,Stephen's other Grandmother was at the public pool in St. Maries and yelled clear across the water, at her foster daughter....Eve....what are you doing out here without your thongs..you get in that room and get your thongs on RIGHT NOW.....needless to say she garnered much attention at the public pool in St. Maries. Her daughter who is in her early teens, was not exactly thrilled! I doubt any man there was thinking of shoes.....

I remember in the fifties when those dumb things came out. They were so uncomfortable with the big chunk of rubber that came up between your big toes....They were all the rage!.....Now Thongs appear to me to be just as uncomfortable.....even if it is not your toes that is rubbed upon............

It should be time for the deep purple huckleberry to appear in our forests. Most people are not aware that the huckleberry you see is probably on a bush that is up to a hundred years old. The Native Americans used to burn off the hillside so the bush would grow less leaves and more berries...the Asians were killing off the plants by hacking the tops off the plants while they were in bloom and shipping them back to Asia to be used in flower arrangements. I hope they have made that practice illegal. I used to get mad at people who broke off the plant and took them into camp; berries and all ,to be picked in front of the camp fire.

I don't really know if either practice really hurt the plant. In light of the Native American practice of burning the bushes down every few years it probably did them little harm. Huckleberries are a natural antioxidant and are reputed to lower one's blood sugar if one is diabetic. I love the smell of the syrup and the pie cooking. I'm not to wild about the flavour.

Mom makes a wonderful huckleberry pie...The smell of them cooking will always be one of my fondest memories......Huckleberries have never been domesticated so they will grow in peoples gardens...Perhaps there are just a few things and secrets that don't belong to man......

Sarvice Berries grow abundantly in my back yard. The Native American used them in pemmican. They pounded and pounded them till they were ground fine and mixed the juice berry and all into suet from venison and other dried meats, somehow,they made patties of it. I have researched and researched them. Still I can find little or nothing about them. I am waiting for them to ripen this year. I want to run them through my juicer and make Jelly from them . I think they are probably to seedy for Jam. I've never found a recipe for them. Most people don't know what they are. I like their tart taste. I've propagated them in my yard for years and years for their early flowers, which are much like the(Idaho state flower) Syringa or the "mock orange" flower that is so abundant in Idaho. They make lovely yard flowers...I also want to make some rose hip jam..I have spread the Cherokee rose seeds all over......they have such a wonderful fragrance....they were named such, for every tear that was held so close during the "trail of tears"..we shall see how much of this I get done.......

I seem to do a lot in the day time......but it seems like so little gets done....perhaps I am just by nature......"a piddler!"












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